Tomato the Cat’s 2004 Summer Movie Reviews
July, 2004
Back in the 1950s and 60s, many of Hollywood’s top westerns were made here at Angel Canyon, where Best Friends now has its home. But our renowned movie critic has discovered that the best summer blockbusters are, in fact, still being made right here at the sanctuary.
Back in the 1950s, many of Hollywood’s top westerns were made right here at Angel Canyon, where Best Friends now has its home. And our renowned movie critic notes that the best summer blockbuster sequels, prequels, and plain old remakes are still being written right here.
Van
Helsing
When it comes time to sink their teeth into terrified maidens, Hollywood Draculas need fake fangs and special effects. But not so Scooter. Check out those perfect pearly-whites!
Scooter had been rescued by a veterinarian, who made him the official welcomer at his clinic. But Scooter started scaring away the clients, not because of his black cloak and fearsome fangs, but because he has no back legs. (If you want to know what’s really scary, it’s people like that!)
Anyway, this sad old Drac came to Best Friends, and he’s now the official welcomer at the Incontinental Suite, where kitties without back legs are rumored to fly at night.
Scooter also has three Wives of Dracula – just like in the real movie. (Wait! This is the real movie!) Check them out in the photos: Pokey, Perceval, and Calamity Jane. (Okay, so Perceval’s a boy; like I said, it’s just a movie, folks!)
Next character we need is Frankenstein’s Monster: a face that only a mother could love . . . and who only wants to be loved. Yes, snorty love-monster Dagwood had to have his bacon saved, just like in the scene at the end of the old Frankenstein movie!
And now all we need is a werewolf. Bring on Harry, a Jersey Wooly whose family ran screaming in terror when his hair became a horror. But every monster has someone who will be faithful to him forever, no matter how he looks. And at the Best Friends Bunny House, it’s Easter. Seems like she has this thing about rabbits with bad hair days.
Next: Spider Dog