Who Wants to Be a Chairpurrson? -- page 2

“You know the rules,” said Tammy. “And you’ve got your three lifelines:

50/50, where the computer will adopt two of the wrong candidates;
Phone a Friend, where you can call anyone at the TLC Cat Club;
and Ask the Audience. Are you ready?”

“Ready for what?” I spluttered. “Of course I’m not ready.”

“Then let’s play Who Wants to Be a Chairpurrson. Okay, you’re going for 64,000 treats. Here’s the question:

“Who won the recent election for Chairpurrson at the Best Friends TLC Cat Club? Was it:
a) Julius,
b) Patience,
c) Bijou, or
d) Camille?”

“You left out Blackjack,” I sniffed.

“Blackjack has stated quite categorically that he will not accept the nomination. You warned the voters of that yourself. Now, do you want to phone a friend?”

“No. People will think I’m calling the PTB.”

“Do you want to ask the audience?”

“We’ve already done that. They’ve sent in their votes. Alright, I think I’m going to go with: b) Patience.”

“Are you sure it’s Patience? Remember, if you’re wrong you’ll be down to 32,000 treats.”

“I’m not sure. It should have been Blackjack but I’m thinking it may be Julius. So, I think I’m going to say: a) Julius.”

Tammy paused. Then she looked up at me. The tension was unbearable.

“Final answer, Boss?”

“No!” I said. “I can’t decide! I’m going to take my treats and walk away.”

The audience cheered.

“Well, congratulations,” said Tammy. “Now, just before you leave, do you want to know who really is the new Chairpurrson?”

“Of course not,” I whispered. “You’ll ruin everything. Just bring on the next contestant and keep handing out the treats.”